So, being a wrestling fan, the biggest angle at the moment is CM Punk’s departure from WWE with the WWE Championship, and the big story at Arsenal is similar, Samir Nasri wanting to leave Arsenal. So for a change from partially serious journalism, what would happen if Samir Nasri became CM Punk.
So initially, Nasri cuts a promo on Arsenal, he calls players like Denilson and Almunia ass-kissers to Arsene Wenger, and that he believes maybe Arsenal will be better after Arsene’s death, but then explains how the team will probably be taken-over by his “doofus” protege Jose Mourinho. He says by the end of June he will leave with the Arsenal Captaincy, and maybe he’ll leave with it to “Barcelona or Manchester City”.
So straight away he’s suspended by Wenger, with the intention of letting him go, this is until Cesc Fabregas comes out and asks for one more match between Arsenal and Barcelona because the fans want to see it, if Arsenal lose Samir is captain and is allowed to leave. Wenger agrees, for the fans, but if Arsenal lose, Cesc will be sold to Tottenham!
Next week, Wenger and Samir have open contract negotiations, Samir wants his face on the crest, his own plane, and Arsenal ‘Ice-Cream’ Bars to be brought back. He also wants Wenger to apologise for not buying who he wants and selling players he feels the team needs. Cesc comes out to confront them both but Samir calls Cesc the player he hates, he’s become a Chelsea player, he’s no longer an underdog, he’s a dynasty, he’s become Chelsea.
Arsenal lose after dodgy refereeing, Samir puts on the captains armband and leaves through the Emirates Stadium crowd.
So yeah, this really wasn’t brilliant, I had to change from Fabregas to Nasri because Samir made more sense than Cesc.